taking first steps

We have kept this site simple for a reason.  There is much information online already, so we wanted to give you a bites size amount of info. (Please do not bite, unless someone asks or agrees!.

Lifestyle (or Rainbow), in this world means: hey I am up for exploring my or our sexuality with an open relationship.  Attending lifestyle clubs is the most popular pursuit as couples derive fun that continues back home in private after the event.  Swinging, BDSM, bondage, fetish… there is no end to activities that get more likes than Facebook.  Swinging is old hat and has been replaced by a reference to the term ‘Open Relationship’ paying homage  to the estimated 350 – 700 million worldwide who share their relationships with others with this referring to singles also, as singles are vital to a threesome!.  When you visit clubs (physical clubs) and dating sites (websites with members that meet), you will find some clubs have millions of members.  You are far from alone with your thoughts and desires.

Vanilla, is not just an under rated flavour of ice cream, it is our name for those people who live outside the Lifestyle world.  Our less sexually adventurous  friends, family and colleagues.  Mind you, you will be surprised to discover that an estimated 1 in 25 are just like you.

Ground rules helped us

Treat an open relation experience as a date.
Agree boundaries for your first experience and treat it as a trial you can both discuss afterwards.
You come first (don’t be rude!). As a couple you both need to discuss and agree to this, your relationship after all comes first.  Do not say yes to please a partner. Be totally open with each other.
Be honest with those you play with. If you only wish to watch, play alongside or touch, say so, I never met anyone who has objected.
Open Relationships are exactly that,being open to new friendships, not just to sexual exploration.
As such take time to choose a couple or partner to join you that you both like. You will be amazed how many new friends swinging will introduce you too (and Vanilla times enjoyed together).
Both of you need to enjoy this if you are to play again, so always be mindful of your partner during play.
Personally, I enjoy seeing my wife being pleasured while I am….well, you get it.

Check out a Club or Dating Site

Clubs often offer low membership fees to encourage new people to attend without commitment. SDC is one club that offers a Free trial membership, a great ‘toe dipping’ experience to learn more (before you may take the plunge).
Pick a night or event where couples or the singles you seek are encouraged.
We look for clubs away from our home area, we do not want the surprise of seeing Phil from the local pub.
On arrival tell them you are new on the scene. You will get a tour and helpful guidance.
Enjoy a dance?. We like clubs with a dance floor as it is familiar and helps dissolve any nerves.
Make a night of it with a stop over nearby but do not overdo the nerve settling drink!.
Dating sites are great for learning about other people, their likes, dislikes and tips.
These sites offer a level of security and discretion when meeting or messaging people.
Clubs often offer different levels of membership from a 1 month trial to lifetime. Unless an offer exists, I would recommend a trial or minimum terms membership whilst you explore the Lifestyle world. Do not limit yourself to a too short period as it may take many weeks before you have the opportunity and courage to attend your first party.
Considering a libertine wife switch or wife exchange experience within your open relationship?  Whether a married mixed or same couple or as a single person – Take it slow and have fun.